Light Bulb Moment

Okay, so here comes some brutal honesty....I still have so much to learn in the mothering department. Hard to believe? No. Am I the only one? I'd venture to guess, no. Was this news to me? Sadly, yes. I've been at this full-time for over 10 years now and you'd think that I'd at least have the basics. But my eyes were opened to a basic fact I was missing. Brace yourself, here it is: You can't expect children to know something you haven't taught them yet.

I've been smacked in the face with this realty lately as I've been dealing with some attitude and character issues with our oldest. I would find myself saying things like "How many times do we have to have this conversation about ________?" Then it hit me, having "conversations" was not teaching or training. How can I expect my children to "behave" when I haven't done any training to equip them to do so? So now I have begun to understand that the most important thing I can teach my children is to have Godly character and to be confident in who they are, not how to read or do their math facts. But then that leaves me with the huge question of what do I do with that realization and make it practically happen. It has now become my "obsession", in a good way of course. I will not fail in equipping my children in this most important of skills.

The last new light bulb moment for me was a saying I have recently re-heard and have begun to focus on. Praise your children 10 more times than you correct them. I want to smother my children with praise so they become so confident in who they are, and like who they are, and never have any doubt as to what my feelings are towards them. I am reminded of the verse "Let Your praises always be on my lips" (Psalms 34:1) and I think this can hold true for my children. Let me be quick to praise so as to protect and nourish their spirits and slow to criticize.